So true !! :):)

 

 

1 stone is enough to break a glass.
1sec is enough to fall in love.

But y d hell 1chapter is not enough to pass in exam...???


A boy's eye is
Faster than Google in searching a
Beautiful girl in crowd...
:
But
...:
A boy's heart is slower than
Governments bus while
Proposing a Girl whom he truly
Loves.


"COLLEGE n SCHOOL are d nickname of HEAVEN"

Hmmm.....
Dats y it is said dat
"COUPLS r made in HEAVEN.



My Teacher pointed at me with a Ruler & said:
"At the End of this Ruler is an Idiot" I still don't get why I got rusticated.
I only asked him, "Which End Sir?"

Professor: What's attention deficit hyperactive disorder?
Student: jimbalakadi bamba.
Professor: Sorry, I don't understand what u said?
Student: Same here sir!


Father to son: why don't u just go and study?
Son: what for?
Father: U'll get good marks...
Son: then?
Father: U'll get good job.
......Son: then?
Father: U'll have big house, new car.
Son: so what after that?
Father: after that U'll relax.
Son: so what do u think I'm doing right now???


Announcement in University:

"The students who have parked their cars on the driveway, please move them"

Another announcement after 20 minutes:

"The 200 students who went to move 9 cars please return to their respective classes"


Ugly Truth:

In Bed,
It's 6AM,
You Close Your Eyes for 5 mins...
...& it's 7:45

But in Office,
It's 9:30am
You Close Your Eyes for 5 mins...
& It's Still 9:31

 

The Art of Appraisal!!

 

The Art of Appraisal 

Big Boss: This year your performance was good, excellent and outstanding. So, your rating is "average". 

UMA: What? How come 'average'? 

Big Boss: Because...err...uhh...you lack domain knowledge. 

UMA: But last year you said I am a domain expert and you put me in this project as a domain consultant. 

Big Boss: Oh is it? Well, in that case, I think your domain knowledge has eroded this year. 

UMA: What??? 

Big Boss: Yes, I didn't see you sharing knowledge on Purchasing domain. 

UMA: Why would I? Because I am not in Purchasing, I am in Manufacturing. 

Big Boss: This is what I don't like about you. You give excuse for everything. 

UMA: Huh? *Confused* 

Big Boss: Next, you need to improve your communication skills. 

UMA: Like what? I am the one who trained the team on "Business Communication", you sat in the audience and took notes, you remember? 

Big Boss: Oh is it? Errr...well..I mean, you need to improve your Social Pragmatic Affirmative Communication. 

UMA: Huh? What the hell is that? *Confused* 

Big Boss: See! That's why you need to learn about it. 

UMA: *head spinning* 

Big Boss: Next, you need to sharpen your recruiting skills. All the guys you recruited left within 2 months. 

UMA: Well, not my mistake. You told them you will sit beside them and review their code, and most resigned the next day itself. Couple of them even attempted suicide. 

Big Boss:*stunned* (recovers from shock) Err...anyway, I tried to give you a better rating, but our Normalization process gave you only 'average'. 

UMA: Last year that process gave me 'excellent'. This year just 'average'? Why is this process pushing me up and down every year? 

Big Boss: That's a complicated process. You don't want to hear. 

UMA: I'll try to understand. Go ahead. 

Big Boss: Well, we gather in a large room, write down the names of sub-ordinates in bits of paper, and throw them up in the air. Whichever lands on the floor gets 'average', whichever lands on table gets 'good', whichever we manage to catch gets 'excellent' and whichever gets stuck to ceiling gets 'outstanding'. 

UMA: (eyes popping out) What? Ridiculous! So who gets 'poor' rating? 

Big Boss: Those are the ones we forget to write down. 

UMA: What the hell! And how can paper bits stick to ceiling for 'outstanding'? 

Big Boss: Oh no, now you have started questioning our 20 year old organizational process! 

UMA: *faints*

 
Note:  U M A =   U, Me or Anyone

 

 

Funny..5 Mins Refresh :)

 

I can walk in water.. Ha ha..

Aaah.. they are so hard

Sweeti..give room for your bro

Hmn.. my color dazzles

Ain't I cute ?

Oh..these rides. Give me a break..

How long u want me to stand like this ?

What are these things ?

Is my beak too long ?

Peek-a-boo..

Ain't I pretty with a flower ?

Aahh.. he always follows me..

Huh..this speck..

Argh..don't look at me that way

Let me stretch a bit..

Hwz my flying ?

Give it to me..

Here we go.. We like to move it move it..

Oyyee.! this way

These humans..Grrhh..

Ain't I better than the humans ?

Noo, I don't wanna pose, my hairstyle has gone bad..

I 'm special. Got a belly right under my beak.!

Lets fight.!

Got ya.!

What the hell do u think of me?

Can I trust him?

My fish, I got it, all by myself..

Mmn..the hairstylist has done a good job this time

Come to big mama.!

Grrrhh...no comments, else...

Uh.! I forgot..

Hahaha..That sounds funny..

Mama.! Mama.! look..

Oooh.!

Don't mess with me..

Hmn..had a hard day..

Quick, u fool..#@.!

Time for some rest..

Whhaat.? I didn't do anything..

shut up, u idiot..

Now, this is what I call Coooool....

Tap dance..